


A Tree in Winter

by Sendryl



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hokage Feels, Hurt No Comfort, Memorial Stone (Naruto), Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24308164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sendryl/pseuds/Sendryl
Summary: Hiruzen makes the hatefully familiar journey to the Memorial Stone, Konoha following behind him.As the sky darkens and the thunder rolls, he can't help thinking about his inability to hold onto any of Konoha's people.He knows it isn't true, knows there are so many faithful who return from the missions he assigns, but right now it feels like it.Like every person he's sent out on missions for the good of Konoha dies.
Relationships: Sarutobi Hiruzen & Konoha
Kudos: 10





	A Tree in Winter

**Author's Note:**

> I woke up from a nightmare at like one in the morning and wrote this in an hour to get rid of sad feelings.

  
  


Hiruzen makes the hatefully familiar journey to the Memorial Stone, Konoha following behind him.

As the sky darkens and the thunder rolls, he can't help thinking about his inability to hold onto any of Konoha's people.

He knows it isn't true, knows there are so many faithful who return from the missions he assigns, but right now it feels like it.

Like every person he's sent out on missions for the good of Konoha dies.

For the good of Konoha.

But what is a Konoha empty of her people?

Nothing but empty promises and bittersweet memories, daydreams of what could've been and nightmares of even worse losses to come.

The skies open with a crack of thunder and a flash of eerie lightning, but it's not enough to drown out the sounds of mourning.

(He was well-liked, despite all his efforts to the contrary.)

Konoha's ninja are spread out before him as he pauses before the Stone, and he knows he'll catch hell for it from Danzo and Koharu, but he bows and then lowers himself to kneel on the ground. Homura will probably understand.

The Hokage presses his forehead to the sodden earth, the same earth that keeps swallowing his people without remorse, and he prays.

"I'm sorry, Minato, Kushina." Two more of his people he failed to keep safe despite all his precautions, two more he failed to protect so they could see their son grow and live out his life beneath Konoha's sheltering branches.

"I'm sorry, Sakumo." An older hurt, but no less painful, another he failed to protect from the harsh consequences of his actions, his inability to see that a mission required just a few more people.

He's failed Konoha so often.

So many names on the Memorial Stone.

And now he's failed them again.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi."

A whisper is all he can manage through this newest hurt.

He rises from the ground, not bothering to brush the mud from his robes. Let it stay. Let it stain his clothes the way this death stains his soul. Let his people see how it drags him down to join those they've lost.

As he carves the kanji with reverent silence, he can't help but wish he could carve his own name and be done with it.

He's so tired.

It was time for him to retire many years ago now, but all the people he would entrust Konoha to keep dying before him.

Who will he lose next? Itachi? Shikaku? Danzo?

As he carves the final line, the kunai slips in his muddy hands and scores a deep cut into the base of his thumb.

Bright blood spills out to strike the ground before the Stone, and Hiruzen can only think it fitting.

Blood for blood, the red-tinged earth calling to mind the report delivered by his pale jounin commander, the churned earth of battle around a bloody corpse, Sharingan missing and porcelain mask in pieces.

Hiruzen bows again, just as low as before, bloody hands and weary head pressing into the unforgiving earth.

"I'm so sorry, Kakashi."

Konoha is her people, and every leaf is precious to Hiruzen.

But right now she feels like a tree in winter, naked and bare and dead.

He will rise from here and speak to his people, tell them about the man they lost in sorrowful tones, and return to his tower to defend them as best he can.

All he wants is to keep his Konoha, his people, safe.

He can only hope that he can prevent more of them from turning to ashes in his hands.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Background thought was: what if Danzo saw every other option for Hokage as a threat and decided to take them out?


End file.
